Ricky Fowler, you got some Ëœsplainin to do.
I get that youre the next big thing on Tour and the coolest thing on wheels, with your five-mile drives, dirt-track motocross sensibilities and taste for those weird flat-brimmed hats that all the sk8r boys are into.
But did you have to steal my colour scheme?
I must admit, Im flattered; I had no idea that my escalating fixation with the colour orange would become such a thing with you. I dont know where you
could have picked up on it, though “ its not like Im on national television every week or anything.
Maybe you were just in the neighbourhood last year and spotted the sick, tricked-out Scotty Cameron Newport 2 Studio Select that started it all a couple of years ago. After all, thats how it happened with me: As soon as I laid eyes on the custom matte-black finish and Cosmic Orange paintfill, I knew I had to have it.
But it didnt stop there.
That putter now lives in the 2010 edition of the Titleist lightweight stand bag, which is resplendent in orange, charcoal and fog, complete with stylin orange-and-black retro Rocket Tour pom-pom headcovers.
For Petes sake, Ricky, I even went out and bought the 10-pack of fluorescent Sharpies just so I could mark my ball with my new favourite colour. I usually wear a FootJoy SciFlex glove “ the ones that come with different accents over the knuckles.
You can guess the shade.
I realize youre not an Acushnet guy, Ricky “ youre in the process of helping to orchestrate Pumas efforts to take over the world. But just because its one of the oldest, most storied brands in the game doesnt mean that Titleist doesnt know how to let its hair down once in a while.
After all, most hardcore players who dont have a guy to carry their 30-pound staff bag all day long will tell you that a good carry bag is one of the most important and practical pieces of gear you can own.
And while it definitely needs to look good, it needs to be functional too.
Such is the case with the Titleist, which boasts all the usual pockets in all the right places, as well as some of the more modern amenities one has come to expect in a golf bag – a pencil pocket on the spine (large enough for an orange Sharpie) and a bottle pocket adjacent to the saddle pocket (large enough for an orange Gatorade).
The apparel pocket is big enough, but not so spacious that youll be tempted to cram it full of stuff that will just end up weighing you down. The bags a fairly scant 4.7 pounds (thats barely more than a couple of kilograms), but when its full of clubs, youll appreciate its best feature: a rubberized handle thats built into the top cuff, precisely where it needs to be.
The adjustable backpack-style shoulder strap, mandatory these days for anyone who spends a lot of time walking the golf course, has four points of adjustment, making it easy to tweak so a player can support the bag at a variety of heights. A padded saddle helps keep the bag from getting too uncomfortable against the back.
The straps could be a bit less prone to digging in to ones shoulders, however.
The bags footprint is wide, due to the fact that the legs are attached at the top of the mouth to ensure a stable position and none of those annoying hijinks when the legs deploy. The legs retract out of the way swiftly and completely, and wont dangle annoyingly behind you, threatening to gouge off your shoes.
Oh, speaking of which, Ricky: Orange is great to accessorize with, but Im not entirely sold on the notion of a complete head-to-toe ensemble, complete with shoes that look like they were spray-painted.
FootJoy has an alternative “ the classy Icon line, where you can use the MyJoys customization feature to add your fave flourish without getting, all, well, Ricky Fowler about it.
Not that it isnt possible to overdo it “ Im sure you saw Poulters sky-blue tootsies at the Tavistock Cup. I kept waiting for someone to crash an airplane into his feet.
Anyway, Ricky, thanks for listening. Best of luck this year “ well be watching.
Hell, how could we not? Youre impossible to miss.